The Dawn

I am a rationalist and I rely on logical thought

The continuity of family names, genealogy, and proud ancestry

Are, I believe, over rated notions

Testimony to men’s overwhelming desire to remain immortal

And live on narcissistically through their descendants

People are born - and then they die

If they’re lucky (and, sometimes, if others are not)

They leave telltale signs of their earthly presence

Offspring that bequeath more of their own kind to this world

Before they depart, and so it goes on, this endless narrative

That they romanticize, eulogize, and philosophize

As an ode to the eternal cycle of life and the part they play in it

I scoff at such mush (though I don’t say so aloud)

Because I am a rationalist and I rely on logical thought.

And then you come along, my grandchild, and shatter my carefully created constructs

I realize (to my horror and my elation)

That a tiny part of me will live through you

And that a tiny part of you will be a reflection of who I am

I search for my mother in the crinkle of your eyes

I find my son in the manner of your smile

There’s a drop of blood that has coursed generations

To reach you and tell you that they lived too

And that you belong to them as much as they belong to you

Like a gentle flame that is passed on from lamp to lamp

You were passed down hundreds of years to light up my life

Is there meaning, perhaps, in a family name, genetic lineage, and proud heritage?

Am I really a rationalist? Do I really rely on logical thought?

I could have felt this way when my son was born

But I didn’t; so why not then and why so now?

As I walk over the top of the hill

Do I seek reassurance from the sunrise at the horizon

Each of its golden rays the genesis of fresh hope 

Infused with the promise of a new day and of eternity

Telling me that it will continue to light up my world

Long after I have let go of it and that nothing will change?

Is that why this sunrise is more precious than the ones before it have been?

And why I linger over it and celebrate each of its changing hues?

Perhaps. Probably. Quite possibly, in fact

It’s a relief to have answers even if they are conjectural

After all, I am a rationalist and I rely on logical thought.